Saturday, July 11, 2009

It's The MOTHERF#@&ING Birds!!!

Although he is an accessory to the crimes (seen yesterday eating pieces of tomatoes), it is apparent the main culprit of the tomato killings is not Mr. Squirrel. The bandits are from above. And here is how I know:

Assuming that Mr. Squirrel was causing the problems, I erected 3 ft. high fencing around the plants. This prevented the furry rodent from climbing into the pots and grabbing the tomatoes. But this afternoon I walked out to the garden to see two birds fly out of the patio tomato plant. Sure enough the red tomatoes, untouched this morning, were damaged and clearly done so by a bird beak.After screaming in anger, frustration, and sadness, I rushed back to Home Depot to finish the protective fortress I started yesterday.

Upon my return, I wrapped the tops of the plants with a plastic mesh designed to keep birds away. With plastic ties, I secured the mesh to the plastic fencing and (hopefully) created a barrier between bird and tomato.My security plans do not end there. A good fortress needs a good guard.

Meet Oswald. His wicked stare could give anyone the heebeejeebees. Let's just hope the birds buy into the fact he guards those tomatoes with his life and is willing to take theirs' to do so.

His permanent replacement is almost ready to stand guard....but you'll meet him later.

One more thing: Don't think this crime went unpunished. I returned the favor by destroying the bird nest in our front gutter. Don't mess with the gardener or you'll get the hose.

No comments: